This manuscript starts with the backstory explaining why the three little pigs needed new homes. After they build their houses, Iggy the wolf attacks, but with comic twists (first he gets straw in his eye; then he gets a splinter in his paw.) When Iggy faints after huffing and puffing at the brick house for 25 minutes, the pigs take pity on him and invite him to dinner. Then things really begin to change.
THE THREE LITTLE PIGS SING AGAIN (new title)
Once upon a time there were three little pigs named Rufus, Elwood and Stanley. They sang with their Poppa in a barbershop quartet called The Four Porkers. Everywhere they sang, the crowds went wild. (Audience consists of various kinds of animals.)
One day Poppa said, “Boys, I can’t take another winter here. Momma and I are selling the house and moving to Florida. The lot next door will still be yours.”
“But Poppa,” said Stanley, “we won’t be a quartet without you. What will we do?”
“Don’t worry,” said Momma, “you’ll figure something out.”
The brothers went to see Hal, their agent. (His sign says, “Gigs for Pigs.”)
“Let’s face it, boys,” he said, “The Four Porkers are history, unless you find a new bass.
Sadly, they went back home.
They helped Momma and Poppa load up their trailer and hugged them good-bye.
“We need to build a new house,” said Elwood.
“Let’s put together something fast,” said Rufus. We can stack up bales of straw.”
“How about bundles of sticks?” said Stanley, “I know a guy . . .”
“Wait!” said Elwood, “I’ve heard that there’s a wolf in those hills who can huff and puff so hard he’ll blow those kinds of houses down. We need something strong, like bricks.”
“Don’t be silly,” said Rufus. “Straw is fine.”
“No, no,” said Stanley, “I can get a good deal on sticks.”
“Didn’t you hear me?” shouted Elwood. “It’s got to be bricks!”
Since they couldn’t agree, each pig built his own house . . .
LOKI THE TROLL AND THE THREE BILLY GOATS
Loki the troll lived in a tumbledown shack in the mountains with his wife, Helga, and their toddlers, Alva and Birki.
One morning as Helga was digging up potatoes, she saw something in the distance that made her run back inside. “Loki! The goats are coming!” she shouted. “Hurry! Go catch us a nice, fat billy goat!”
“Never fear, my dear,” he answered. “I will bring home a fine one.”
Alva clapped her hands and cheered, “Yea! Goat stew!”
Loki grabbed a coil of rope and started down the rocky path.
Just before the bridge where the goats always crossed the river, there was a farm. He peeked over the stone wall, and saw beautiful, ripe pumpkins. But on the other side of the pumpkin patch stood a mean-looking dog. Loki backed away.
When he got to the bridge, he tied one end of the rope to a tree and laid it across the bridge. Holding the other end, he hid behind a rock.
“Heh, heh!” he chuckled, “I’ll pull it tight when a billy goat gets here. When he stumbles, I’ll grab him.”
MY FLY IS IN A JAR AND THE JAR
IS IN THE CAR
“Gotcha!”said Jay as he clapped a jar over a fly.
He put the lid on, and held up the jar. “Hi,” he said, “What’s your name? Ray? My name is Jay. Would you like to live here?”
He watched Ray walk around the jar.
Then he said, “I wish you were a real pet, like a dog.”
He took the jar over near the pictures of dogs on his wall.
“Don’t you wish you were a beagle? Or a border collie?”
He sat down on his bed. “Every time I ask for one, my
folks say,‘Maybe some day.’”
“Jay! Are you dressed?” he heard Dad yell. “Let’s get this show on the road.”
Jay knew he meant, “Hurry up.” Jay had to get going because he helped Dad with the grocery shopping every Saturday morning. He ran downstairs.
Then he realized he was still holding the jar. There wasn’t time to go back, so he stuffed it into his jacket pocket.
Edgar Beaver doesn't fit in. Everyone else seems content to chop down trees all day, and he wants to draw and paint awesome pictures.
Greta Goose doesn't fit in either. She's not content to eat corn, corn, corn every day. She has seen pictures of wonderful food in a cooking magazine and she wants to become a chef. They're off to Big City to realize their dreams, but they hit some detours along the way.
BENNY CAN DO ANYTHING
Benny and his brother Otto were hunting for breakfast. "Let's try that house," said Benny.
"Hmmm," said Otto, "there's a cat on the porch. We'll have to go up that pole, cross the wire, and find a crack somewhere.
"I can do that," said Benny. "Let's go."
Once they were in, all they had to do was follow their noses to the snack cabinet.
"Woo hoo! Cheezy Curlz! Tater Chips! Twinkeez! This place is great," Otto said, as they gobbled up goodies.
When they were stuffed, Benny said, “Ready to go?”
“Oooh! I can’t even move,” said Otto. “Go ahead, I’ll see ya back home.”
“I think I’ll catch the Sox game first,” said Benny. “See ya tonight.”
Benny was daydreaming as he strolled toward the stadium, when, “Oof!” He bumped into a mouse he’d never seen before. She was lovely. He tried to talk, but he just croaked, “Ah - ah.”
“Excuse me,” she said, and started to walk away.
He didn’t want her to go! “Wanna go to a baseball game?” he asked.
She giggled. Then she said, “Sure. By the way, I’m Ava.”
“I – I’m B- Benny,” he stammered.
As they walked, they started getting to know each other. Benny found out that Ava was a big baseball fan too. He always loved watching a game, but he also loved the popcorn, candy, and potato chips under the seats.
Between innings, he dashed between people’s feet, snatched goodies, and gobbled them up in a flash. Ava
only ate a few peanuts.
On the way home Benny said, “That was fun. Wanna be friends?”
Ava nodded and invited him for dinner.
“You can look at my picture books while I get dinner,” she said.
Benny settled down on her couch thinking, “Aah, what a great day.”
When Ava called him in to the kitchen, he gasped. The plates were filled with carrots, peppers and beans.
I didn’t even want to go to Gramma and Grampa’s that day that Mom was going to clean for her. Mom thought I was in a grumpy mood because Emma had a birthday party to go to and I didn’t, but that’s not it. It just makes me sad to see Gramma sick. Even though Grampa said he’d take me fishing and we hadn’t been out in the boat since fall, I thought it would probably be a kind of yucky day.
Mom dropped me off at the dock and Grampa had the boat all ready to go. Just seeing him cheered me up. “Ready for some fishin’?” he called.
“Sure,” I answered. “What do you think we might
"Oh, maybe some striped bass,” he said.
Well, you’ll never guess what we caught. A little octopus! I brought it up in the net and Grampa removed the hook. As soon as I dumped it on the deck, it started exploring the boat. I was wishing I could keep it, but Grampa said it would be happier back in the bay. I gently pushed it back into the net and started lowering it into the water. Well then – oh, man, you won’t believe this – I heard a funny voice say, “Thank you! You are so kind, I’m going to grant you three wishes! Think about them carefully-y-y-y-y.”
EDGAR AND GRETA - Big City, Here We Come
Every beaver at Long Pond was hard at work—except for Edgar. He was scratching in the mud with a stick.
“Edgar!” yelled the boss, “What are you doing?” "I-I was just drawing,” muttered Edgar. "Why?” asked the boss.
“I just like to,” said Edgar.
“You’re supposed to be working. Get busy,” said the boss, and he stomped away.
“Nobody here understands me,” thought Edgar. His eyes filled with tears. He turned and walked toward the road so no one would see, and – OW – he bumped into a pole.
He looked up. There was a sign that said,
“BIG CITY ART SCHOOL: THE SMART CHOICE!”
"That’s it!” he thought. “I’ll go to art school!” He set off down the road.
Meanwhile, at the Larson Farm, Gramps was tossing corn to the geese.
"Corn, again!” said Greta, “Doesn’t anybody else get tired of eating corn every day?
The other geese simply stared at her.
Just then, Greta smelled a wonderful aroma coming from the Larsons’ window. As she walked closer, a gust of wind blew Mrs. Larson’s HOME COOKING magazine off the porch chair. Greta studied the pictures of yummy-looking food. Then she saw an ad that said, “LEARN TO COOK AT BIG CITY COOKING SCHOOL”
“That’s it!” she thought. “I’ll go to cooking school!” She set off down the road.
Fox Guards The Henhouse
In the tall yellow grass behind the big field, Fox was hidden safely, curled up with her kits. Suddenly, she heard a commotion. (Kids playing soccer)
“It’s not safe here!” she thought.
She began to move her kits one by one, but while the last kit was still waiting, a young boy found him.
“You must be lost,” he said.
He took the kit home.
When Fox came back, she searched frantically, but her kit was nowhere to be found. “The others need me,” she thought. She had no choice but to return to them.
The boy knew that this tiny creature needed milk, so when he reached home, he gently placed him in with his dog. She had milk for her puppies.
Dog looked at Kit. She looked at the boy.
“Humf!” she thought, “Doesn’t he know how busy I am?
I have to guard the hens! I have to take care of my own pups! Now he’s giving me another mouth to feed?”
Then she looked down at Kit again.
He was sweet and tiny and helpless. She sighed, and moved over a little to make room for him.
QUIT YOUR BICKERING!
This is Pinky. You might wonder about her name, because these days it’s hard to see the pink under all of that mud. But when she was little, she was cute and pink.
This is Penny. No one ever wonders about her name. Her feathers look like shiny copper and she likes to keep them clean.
One fine morning, Pinky was showing off her eight new piglets for the first time.
“Ooh, they’re as pretty as a basket of pansies,” said Della. Everyone clucked in agreement.
Just then, Penny came out of the henouse, followed by her ten new chicks. The whole flock
bustled over to see them.
“Ooh, they’re as darling as spring dandelions,” said Dominique. Everyone clucked in agreement.
“Humph!” grunted Pinky.
Later, as her chicks happily explored their world, Penny flew up
to the fencepost for a bit of preening time.
She happened to glance down at the pigpen, and she said without thinking, “Yuck!”
Pinky looked up and said, “What did you say?”
“I said, ‘yuck,’” said Penny. “I don’t know how you can stand to be so
filthy. What an eyesore you are!”
Pinky was highly offended. “Who do you think you are, calling me that, Miss Prissy Feathers?”